Thursday, May 5, 2011

*facepalm*

I've about fucking had it. Really.

I don't want to be this person. I don't want to bitch constantly. I don't want to be the complainer, the downer.

I don't want to be disappointed all the damn time. 

I am in a sinking circular logic ship and it's going down fast.

I'm frustrated.
I'm such a whiner and I'm so sick of listening to myself.

How the hell do I figure out what to do here? I don't know. I just don't.

I keep telling myself that I should just put it away. I should put the damn book away and just stop pretending.

So, no one wants it. It's not the end of the world, right?

Move on, right?

I tried to work on a second book idea, even a third and fourth.

Fucking stuck...on all of them.

What's the damn problem?

NO self-confidence. None. I don't believe in what I'm writing. I don't believe in what I'm doing.

Have we had this conversation before? Yep.

Anything getting better? Nope.

11 comments:

  1. For what it's worth, I've had this conversation with myself a multitude of times. I find it's like a tide. Goes in and out, ebb and flow and all that. Right now, it happens to be out.

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  2. I wouldn't get too upset, it's just the writer blues. It would probably be more of a concern if you never felt this way.
    best,
    mood

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  3. Hope it helps to know that we've all felt like this. I like M.J.'s comment that compared it to the tide, and agree with Mood too.
    Paula Martin’s Potpourri

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  4. **smack, smack** snap out of it!
    just kidding =)
    I'm sorry to make light of your whining, but do you really want to be coddled?
    I think you need a change of scenery - some kind of change to get out of your rut.
    get away from writing/querying and such. read something, watch a movie, go out and relax with friends or people-watch at the park or the mall - the ideas will come when you aren't pining for them (they're shy!)
    now go have a nice fret-free weekend!

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  5. This too shall pass. I know, it doesn't sound too useful, until it has passed, but it will.

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  6. Thanks everyone.
    I mean it.
    It's not why I wrote it, but its nice to hear.

    But, when do you know to hang it all up?

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  7. Ah, ditto what everyone else says. We all have these days. Go out and scream!! It'll help! When I get this feeling, I take a short break - a few days, sometimes a week. Kick back, rejuvenate, look for fresh ideas, I usually find interesting characters in local cafes, parks or even a boat ride -and its good to get outside of the house.

    Hope you have a good weekend!

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  8. You are awesome. Just don't forget that. It is ok to whine and get upset. It is better to get it all out. Give yourself some ''you time'', if possible.

    I never mind reading your posts. Just don't give up. All the best. I hope things get better for you soon.

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  9. What's the alternative?? Cleaning house? You hate cleaning the house. Doing yard work? You hate doing yard work. Volunteering at the school? Oh, wait, you hate kids and school. Exercising? Ha, ha, ha. Get a job outside the house? Ughhhh.
    Since the way you are doing "it" isn't working, try another method. Try an outline this time. Try writing a synopsis of a book you haven't written and then write a story around it.
    Or put it all away for two weeks, catch up on other stuff and then the ideas and dialogue may come flowing out because you are not thinking of them and putting yourself in stress.
    Says the lady who has to come up with two short poems and an article on a pet for the Newsletter by Tuesday.
    Hang in there Sweetie, I have faith.
    Remember, they don't call writers and poets tortured for nothing.

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  10. Suz - You're killing me. Tortured is right. ;)

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