Saturday, April 2, 2011

B is for Butts up at the library! - A to Z Challenge

Yeah! You heard me! I said butts!

My five year old would be laughing his little butts off right now if I said that to him. That and fart. Funniest words ever according to him.

Anyhoo...I'm at my wonderful, gorgeous library the other day and I'm pretty BUMmed when I realize that I don't spend nearly enough time with my butt up in the air!

What does that mean?

It means that there are soooooo many books on the BOTTOM shelves that we may be ignoring because we don't want to put our butts in the air to bend over to read them.

I know its embarrASSing. Hell, if anyone could understand about not wanting their DUFF on display, it would be me! I have junk in the TRUNK to spare! 

Get it? Spare? In the trunk?

Anyway...I just want everyone to know that its okay. I know there are great books on the down low. And I know that you have to bend over to find them!

So, go ahead! Don't turn the other CHEEK!

Stick that DERRIERE high in the air and check out those great titles!

You just never know who you might discover!

Come back on Monday for the letter C!


  1. Haha! Heather, this really made me laugh! I'm gonna stick my butt in the air more often now.

  2. LMAO (no pun intended)!! This cracked me up. Some of the best books are on the bottom shelves. Butts up!

    I'll stop now :)

  3. I just sit on the ground when I want to reach the books on the bottom shelf. B for butt is hilarious.

  4. LMBO (pun well and truly intended!)

  5. haha! cool post! I can almost see this situation - butts up. personally I tend to sit down cross-legged :)

  6. Hee hee.. this cracked me up. When I got married, I was promoted from an M to a D, and when I started publishing, I wondered if that meant more people would find my books.

    Poor Z people. =)

  7. Almost scared to see what you have in store for C. Awesome post-erior for B, though!

  8. The second butt-related A-Z post of the day :). This one made me laugh. For me, I always sit down on the floor to search for the books on the lowest shelf...or squat, which works out the thighs!

  9. Ha ha! Great point! :) Next time I go to the library I wanna see some butts!!

  10. Thanks everyone. I was hoping you guys would get it and you didn't let me down!

    Jeffrey - Don't worry.

  11. lol I love the way you wrote this. I just sit on my heels. My balance is good. ;-)

  12. Haha, great post. Made me chuckle :)


  13. So true, so true! I need to go get my butt in the air!

  14. Cute post. My butt is frequently in the air. If it offends anyone, they don't have to look!

    If you're stuck for the letter M on the 15th, I'm holding a blogaversary blogfest to celebrate 1 year of blogging. (shameful plug)

  15. new follower here! this post is funny (but also very true). Although, i myself, prefer to just sit on the floor if i can't reach the bottom shelf.

  16. Back in high school (mid to late 90s) I followed in my (13 years older than me) brother, and I worked in the Brookline Public Library. I worked as what's called a "Page". I was the guy who went and got things for people, and returned books to their shelves after they were signed in, etc...

    In the basement was a ton of older material, in an area called "The Stacks".

    The second level down was filled with periodicals, old news papers, and magazines, and I (being 15 at the time) found an old Playboy from the '70s. I asked my supervisor about it, and she said that the library used to stock them, but they kept getting stolen, so they stopped.

    I thought it was a little warped that a public library would stock such things, but being a teenage boy, I wasn't going to question it.

    One day while sitting in the stacks, waiting for someone to request an old copy of home and gardens, I thought "Kept getting stolen eh?" Gears began to turn, and I eventually found, in a remote corner of the stacks, tucked beneath the bottom shelf, a stack of similar girly magazines.

    About a decade later, I mentioned this find to my brother who'd worked there some 13 years before me, and he said "Yeah, were they in the corner where I left them?"

    Sorry to hijack the comments, but you dislodged a memory! I'll be following you now, methinks! :D

    Matt Conlon dot com
    Matt's Brew Log

  17. I'm glad I got a chuckle out of so many of you. If I sat on the floor between the shelves I may never get back up!

    Matt - Great memory. Thanks for sharing it.

  18. Ha ha! Very funny post, but oh so true. I always do the knee bend so I don't have my behind sticking out. Then I have to figure out a way to get back up without falling over! Glad my Surprise Me! button brought me to your blog.

  19. Kris - You have a Surprise Me! Button? That is awesome!
    I'm so glad you came too.

  20. that is a very good point! I'm off to investigate the joys of the bottom shelf - loved your post

  21. Love your B is for Butt. You have my kind of humor, girl. Not always found in the highest social circles, but people find me funny! Love it. Will follow you for the A-Z.

  22. Laura - Good luck. Wear good pants!

    Jeanne - What's a social circle?
    Thanks so much for coming by to visit and the follow!


  23. This is very clever! I look for the little stool people use to reach the high shelves and then sit on that to look at the bottom shelves. Dual purpose stool....

    You are so creative and very funny! Love you!!!



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